What amazes me about Iowa isn’t that every motorcycle on the road is a Harley — it’s that every other town has a gigantic Harley dealership. And they’re no ordinary dealerships, either. Think Alhambra, or maybe Versailles as built by the Chrome King.
According to the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy1, my home state of Oregon has more land area and more people than Iowa. And yet, a cursory search of HD’s website reveals 8 Harley dealers in Oregon — and 20 dealers in the Hawkeye State.
The overwhelming dominance of the cruiser in Iowa has been a mystery to me, until now. I guess you could say I finally get it.
Going Slow in a Straight Line
I’ll get the obvious out of the way first. Iowa is flat and all the roads are in a straight line.
I’ve had the pleasure of spending some time in the lovely town of Clarion, IA, and during the entire time I visited, I found one road that was not straight. It had 3 corners.
Iowa is the kind of place where a farmer can hop into the air-conditioned cab of a tractor, turn up the country hits station on the satellite radio, and take a nap while the GPS drives the tractor around the fields. We all know the jokes about riding a cruiser in a straight line, but it’s based on a kernel of truth. All the qualities that make a superbike great would be wasted on Iowa roads, except for rocket-launcher starts I suppose.
Everyone is a Farmer
This is the heart of my epiphany. Everyone in Iowa is either a farmer, or works in an industry closely connected to farming.
The high season is spring, summer, and fall. It’s not like a farmer can just take off for a week of riding while there’s beans to be sprayed and corn to be corned2. If your free time consists of a couple hours stolen here and there, the 60 mile range of a bar-hopping cruiser actually makes sense.
And you know how they say a Harley’s got a motor like a tractor? Enough said.
Unresolved Questions
I still have a few things I’m curious about:
Trikes. Specifically, trikes piloted by able-bodied men in their early 40s. In South Korea, only old people ride trikes3.
The popularity of the Doo-rag of Protection:
I’ll just have to visit again. For research purposes, of course.
One Last Thing
I saw this at DIA:
Just wanted to see if Bobskoot is paying attention.
- Wikipedia [↩]
- Yes, I made that word up. [↩]
- http://slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=04/11/30/0034259 [↩]
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An entertaining, thought provoking post about the popularity of cruisers in the rural Midwest. I’ve always wondered about the number and size of HD dealers in some parts of the country. I wondered how the stayed in business.
Richard
Corned – I think that refers to brining meat using coarse salt, saltpeter and spices as in corned beef. Not sure about corned corn…
@RichardM: I can’t believe I forgot about “corned” as in corned beef. I hope I haven’t pissed off the Irish.
I’m a great fan of author Dave Barry. I always wondered why he reckoned the Iowa state motto should be “Handy to Illinois”. From a motorcycling perspective, now I know why!
I think I might buy a cruiser if faced with those straight roads, or move state.
If you move one state to the west and another south, you’ll be where I live with similar results, Harleys and farms. Just less corn and more wheat. I’m not knocking Harleys, but have decided they are not for me. But the Harley dealers do a pretty good business around here.
That road…it’s just sad and wrong! Won’t be movin’ to Iowa anytime soon. I’ll ride a trike if the balance goes and it’s the only way to stay on a bike. Or maybe just move on up to a convertible. Now I must go I have corn to be corned and and peas to be pea-ed…oh wait…that doesn’t work does it?
What an interesting post. Bet you’re a great traveler, even when you can’t do it on a bike, if visiting Iowa stimulated your imagination this much.
Farmers and bikes: Rural Indiana and rural Iowa have a lot in common, though I think Iowa probably has more corporate megafarms than Indiana. Farmers I know here tend not to be much interested in motorcycles after their mid-20s, but until then there’s an ATV-dirt bike-dual sport-sport bike ladder of thrills farm kids like to climb. But I can see the appeal of the big cruisers for the farming adults who are interested in riding. 1) perfect for leisurely lunchtime ambling to liars’ tables at diners to meet their cronies; 2) even the biggest, wealthiest farmers tend to develop some superior mechanical ability — spending the time to have somebody else repair a tractor hurts them more than spending the money — so they can work on bikes if so inclined; 3) farmers have had some pretty good years lately (esp. 2008, when the rest of the economy went completely to hell), so buying a $20K harley or whatever is a trifling expenditure compared with the combines and grain-storage systems they’re updating; 4) A good many farm couples of middle age and beyond break 500 lbs combined, and, if shopping for motorcycles, probably seek the ample horsepower and robustness of frame and suspension available in big cruisers.
@Geoff James: Know what I would get? I’d buy a Hayabusa and slap an extended swingarm out back. HOT!
@cpa3485: That’s what got me going on this subject — wondering how these tiny towns (less than 10,000 people) can support a Harley dealer of that size. I guess it’s easy when you’re the only game in town!
@kari: LOL!
@HoosierCoot: Is my motorcycle obsession showing? I’m enjoying the comments from Midwesterners who have the local perspective. (PS: LOL @ your point #4. Iowa certainly does BBQ and fried food well.)